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| Fuck, when you made lot of money with one click, you brain become numb.. what kind of game we are in |
| I mean maybe some idiots did |
| Yup |
| Have fun bro war is closer to over than it is not. !RemindMe 365d\n\nSPY is 680\n\nI’ll be back to call you a 🤡 or 👑 |
| HOVR |
| all I heard is this afternoon sometime |
| Best short of the year, so far, has been INTU. Followed closely by TSLA. I don’t think either one is too late to put on. Or add to. |
| All I'm seeing is taco round 3 incoming |
| Chart forming double cock formation |
| $695 calls EXP 5/15. How dumb is it? 🧍🏻♀️ |
| remember when SNDK seemed crazy high when it was $120? |
| [Hezbollah MP declares they will not honor negotiations between Israel and Lebanon](https://x.com/osint613/status/2042293405389091147?s=46) |
| Spy just pumped like $5. Way too bullish in here?? |
| THIS IS GOING TO BE THE GREATEST DOUBLE TOP OF ALL TIME \n\n!banbet SPY 600 30d |
| "Your gonna win so much your gonna keep winning" - unless your a bear |
| Here's a piece of information that is not at all relevant according to the market per Al Jazeera \n\nFollowing Netanyahu’s announcement that he has issued an instruction to start direct negotiations with Lebanon, Israel’s Foreign Minister Katz has told Channel 14 that “the war will not be stopped.”\n\n |
| How does $BULL just underperform every day? |
| Having to gas up today makes me feel like I’m top ticking gas prices |
| Looks like WeBull |
| https://preview.redd.it/3nfke8yh97ug1.jpeg?width=1200&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=04a3975d6f968c0bbb05df56b312c60fe2571561\n\n |
| I can count the ships leaving the strait on my fingers. |
| Always has been. Always has been. |
| are these gains really here if they are gone tomorrow |
| gdp and personal income both missed, but why would that matter |
| Wish it happened to me because no one has done that to me smfh. |
| Disgusting $INTC just go down already |
| Maybe, but a rich pussy |
| Are the SaaS bros joining Wendy's? It's frustrating to see tape bombs from Anthropic every fucking week.... |
| I agree he did taco, but you’re telling me when the strait is still closed next week and oil keeps going up he’s not gonna do anything about it? I hope your right but think there will be more to come |
| Hormussy opening tomorrow 🥵 |
| its a casino after all, 50/50 |
| Jesus christ, CRM goes all the way back to beginning of 2019 levels. |
| Spy to 700 and oil to 120!! |
| BREAKING: OVERLEVERAGED INSTITUTION PUMPS MARKET TO DUMPS BAGS |
| When’s the announcement on x from the Iranian rep? |
| SPY and Nasdaq are now clearly positively correlated with the price of oil... \n |
| Why is American taxes so complicated lol |
| I was scared of being flagged as a PDT. I got flagged last week. It actually is really nice. No more worrying about overnight risk if I am out of trades and I am more disciplined with my trades so far. |
| tax isnt about filing it correctly , its finding the right way to talk to lady at a tax office to figure out what she needs and how to fill it into a system , when something doesnt fit or somewhere is a mistake |
| Ugh I knew Amazon at $200 was a steal |
| Damn straight I am, I’m trying to make some mf money and the market act like trusting an orange and his husband big yahu are all of a sudden trustworthy |
| missiles and drones \nmissiles and drones \nEveryone wishes \nFor missiles and drones \nHow do you measure it's worth \nJust by the pleasure \nIt gives here on Earth?\n\nmissiles and drones \nmissiles and drones \nMean so much more when I see \nmissile and drone decorations \nOn every Christmas tree \n |
| I’m sure they haven’t thought of that. (But in reality, remember that threat was eliminated four or five times in March) |
| They aren’t fighting Lebanon they’re fighting Hezbollah. Last I checked they aren’t negotiating with them LMAO |
| They are long dated calls that expire Jan 15, 2027. USO hasn’t peak yet. |
| Anyone looked at $STIM? Tiny brain stimulation device company, 26% short interest, and last week a 14% shareholder sent a public letter demanding a sale. Board responded same day basically saying "yeah we're undervalued, we're listening." New CEO, just turned cash flow positive for the first time in years, trading at 0.6x sales. No one's talking about it. Feels like it's sitting on a spring. 🧠🚀 |
| You're a pussy then. |
| I wonder if the movements of MU can be better forecasted through tea leaves, tarrot cards or chicken bones. |
| Katz will do whatever Mr. Mango wants him to do. He's a retard but he's calling the shots and right now he wants to gtfo of this shit. |
| thank you president xi |
| If you live in easy states for taxes like AZ and do really standard ar basic deductions. \n\nYou're already an idiot for using anything. \n\nBut if you move into itemized and trade stocks etc. You will have the wrong form. It will mis fill it out. It will get you audit as it WILL force eyes on it. \n\nAt this point I would say a better gamble would be stop paying taxes than FORCE an audit upon yourself. |
| Way too bullish in here. Its like watching a 44 year old woman clutching at every unmarried manchild that comes her way |
| SPY is going to hit 700 and nothing at all will have changed about the war lmao |
| I’m not Jewish lmao, just not an ignorant cunt like you, pussy |
| Bulls bag holders secured now we go down |
| all you need to know is that even Germany is considering dumping their migrant populations back in Syria.\n\nwho is the market for DUOL, especially with vibe coded instructional tools inevitably coming online |
| To the short sellers at $681 on the ladder. Just relax, let this thing happen. |
| Chapter 7 bankruptcy |
| Source: https://aje.news/g3p6oe?update=4477914 |
| MSFT ain’t gonna come back until openai crashes |
| finally getting a gain on STZ, been months bro |
| What does low key it even means? I don't think he understands what lowkey means lmao |
| Don’t care, I’ll keep adding puts a month out on every bump. |
| 683 is probably when I would load up on puts. But not before then. Market pumped above 55 EMA today and will close above it, institutions are buying. |
| remember how we feared nuclear annihilation on tues morning? sigh.... |
| Really 0 reason not to go all in on massive amounts of leverage in this market. \n\nAt most you are in the red for like 16 hours. At most. \n\nIt’s basically a guaranteed win. |
| I’m in!!! |
| What time? |
| I pay a cpa $160. Nice to have some peace of mind and if there's any questions I can just text them whenever |
| Bers are the kind of guys who hedge their SPY puts with MSFT calls. |
| You gotta feather the accelerator. |
| Ketchup with that? |
| I’m starting a jet ski rental business in the straight waters are quiet |
| Unleeeess |
| They should give it to the new ayatollah for the actual win |
| With insight like that you could be secretary for war in no time. |
| OP did say they double checked though so seems like they did their homework. |
| this is just ridiculous |
| Well a nice look back over the last two weeks, we eventually did get the fall down to 630s and have had an insane dead cat bounce back up to 680 today. \n\nNo way we go back to ATHs the Marcos won’t support it. |
| What time is the statement? |
| I wish you luck in Federal Prison. |
| Tomorrow? |
| nonsense |
| I read that as “a new fucking account”. It’s a whole different scenario |
| We did Turbo Tax and H&R Block in years past and when we found a real human to do our taxes that was not from a chain, holy hell did it make all the difference. Even amended past returns we had done. If you've got major investments, you shouldn't be skimping out on doing taxes for free. Unless youre auditing everything the AI did and know tax law and the changes, there is no guarantee that Claude won't fudge numbers or make stuff up to gain your favor. |
| Trade 1: -$1640 || Trade 2: +$20\n\nWe’re so fucking back boys. |
| SIRI PLAY DUALITY BY SLIPKNOT |
| Just imagine if this is the same thing you did last year and it repeated this year, now imagine where you end up with |
| Real talk |
| Iran placing trades now before making their statement today |
| This is so obviously bullish for TSLA 500 P/E soon |
| About 32 hours per week to operate. 5% annual growth. Not too sure about inventory, maybe $50,000 |
| Accountants also offer compliance. You're not paying them to do basic math, you're paying them to put their name on the line stating that it's correct, based on the information you provided them. |
| bulls why did you stop buying at these cheap prices this is the bottom |
| Lmao at bears and liberals thinking the world is ending 🤣 |
| They can't do that without boots on the ground |
| look up "iranian mosaic defense"\n\nthere is a decentralized command structure, independent decision making authority, and they often don't have direct comms to one another\n\nit's like fighting 31 different irans, not 1 |
| The Vix is dying - Place your Bets |
| Hey Siri, play numb by Linkin Park |
| I might ride my yacht through the Strait this weekend. |
| People still not realizing the algos and announcements are coordinated and on the same team... Crazy. |
| Right? Seems pretty obvious |
| What comes next after tripling down? I am a gay ber and my vocab and IQ doesn't cover this.\n\nAnyway, more puts on SPY. This price is ridiculous considering everything. |
| Try calls_every_day |
| Played around with this year's Roth contribution these past two weeks. Made $700 off USO and $22 off MSFT. I should have just VTI and chilled with much less stress looking at the way everything is pumping. |
| don´t worry about CPI, CPI won´t set the direction in any way no matter if it´s "good" or "bad", **CPI, will be the EXCUSE FOR ALGOS TO MOVE THE WAY THEY WANT**... you can spin CPI or anything really in either direction, they´re just an excuse for algos, not a cause of anything...\n\nyou could spin WW3 to be bullish, it´s a fugazi guys |
| Netanyahu: Instructs to start ceasefire negotiations with Lebanon \n\n -> 10 minutes later\n\nKatz („defense“ minister): Tells the media that „the war will not be stopped“\n\nbruh |
| Lebanon being bombed? This smells of a bull trap for tomorrow. Nothing has changed, strait is closed, bombs are still dropping, oil still expensive, peace deal probably not even happening anymore.\n\nNo clue what's going on today, but the market will react eventually |
| Remember learning about how in WW2 the Germans used the Enigma machine to encrypt messages and the US used the Navajo code talkers to speak in an unknown language? That's how real strategy is discussed in war. So secretly it is virtually impossible to decipher for the enemy. They did not announce their next moves. Ever. That is how we know this whole thing is a fucking fugazi and not for actual war purposes. |
| Yes you're right, I saw a poster in the post office about that website, I guess it is .gov |
| Is there anything this man can't do? |
| Im no ber or bull im holding cash |
| Market is future looking, and it sees world peace in within 6-12months /s |
| IDK looks pretty interesting culturally |
| Bad CPI might pump it even more |
| I bought AMZN calls at the bottom a couple weeks ago and sold today at 233. Feeling pretty good about that play. |
| Grok keeps rounding all my numbers to .69 is this normal? |
| Maximum pain |
| I'm glad I sold all my stocks except nvda and went all SPY last week |
| I need to create a fucking new account. This is not working! |
| Bulls will be rug pulled and drafted on the same day, but what day |
| This absurd pump and comments like this make me even more confident buying puts today lmfao. |
| Everything is bullish |
| I heard King Orange wants the Masters Trophy for winning the war. |
| They already stopped, that's why it's rallying |
| Hold puts, buy more monthly puts at discount, scalp calls for intraday gains. Stack silver and gold in background. Buying 30 gal gasoline before price goes exponential in a couple weeks. Guh. |
| Lol content king 👍 |
| Why don't we just blow up irans ability to shoot missiles at people in the strait. |
| Go to Israel and braid your sideburns good boy p |
| Surely novo nordisk is a buying opportunity? Surely... Surely it won't fuck me over like it did in the past? |
| I tried 2 years ago but getting a visa from US, U.K, or Canada is a bitch and they want You to be with a tour guide 24/7. So, I said fuck it. |
| It will be back relax it’s a blue chip 🤣 |
| God if you’re real I just want to break even and I’ll quit (said this 100 times) |
| It's honestly impressive how long I can stare at it being the exact same price |
| You can't though. The price just went up. Someone else bought. \n\n\nIt doesn't matter how fucked the situation is, it's just that there are a lot more buyers than sellers. |
| More people need to understand that some things require deterministic output, and no LLM can provide that. I've had to shut down multiple proposals at work with people thinking AI should be used for this and that, and I have to tell them to run the same query 1000 times and tell me how many times the answer diverges. |
| #Royal Caribbean is up on the news that it can resume cruise trips to Hormoz Strait LMAO🤌 |
| Isreal in talks with Lebanon for ceasefire. Non-Iranian ship made it through the strait. |
| BREAKING: WSB REGARD SAYS "TOP", MARKET RISES TO INVERSE WSB REGARD |
| Who you calling loose? |
| I can't speak to Intuit regarding compliance, but I know its non-existent on the major LLMs. |
| I gotta get back into my current New Vegas playthrough. |
| have bears capitulated yet, they managed to run the RSI up on the indexes to over 70 on the hourly and 4hour and over 60 on the daily during a war with oil at 100 and bad data prints. Truly comical |
| Back to 678 |
| Something about lebanon, ceasefire\n\nCant find notifications its gone. |
| How does it feel to not lose $XXXX.XX ?? 😀 |
| I was wondering what Kristi Noem has been up to..., |
| I went full cash on April 7th. I like to stay away from the mega-caps. Bought the dip today on some beaten down software (mostly RPA, payroll, and IT ticketing stuff): 8k on each: FRSH, G, NICE, PATH, PAYC, PCTY, PEGA, TEAM.\n\nNot using any margin though. I'll consider it if dips much further.\n\nTEAM has ass fundamentals, but I see Jira used everywhere. Maybe now that they laid off a bunch of people they can coast easier. Who the hell knows. |
| Any thoughts on Bravos? Anyone subscribe? |
| Bers really love losing money |
| Correct it's all fake digital casino numbers. |
| DUOL… please… show even the smallest sign of life |
| "Claude, clone Reddit for me, but change the name to Greenit. \n\nwhile you're at it whip me up 10 million bots to fill it with hyper realistic-dialogue comments, posts, and memes. Heres a debit card with $250,000 to spend on scattering them all over the world in as many data centers as possible within that budget. Here's another debit card with $750k, use these funds to Astroturf support for this site on all forms of social media as efficiently as possible, reusing the same bots you set up for Greenit. "\n\n\n\n |
| Which is why WTI futures are currently sitting at 88 and not 50, there is obviously a rebalancing of supply and demand levels in the short term. But nothing that suggests we wouldn’t be able to function at-capacity. Market makers aren’t sitting back and going “gee wizz, I wonder if the US is gonna blow their SPR and run out of oil, I think I’l wait and see what happens!” You would see futures above 130 if this was a realistic scenario. |
| is Intel due for a dump after earnings? looks like the same scenario as last earnings |
| Helpless gay bears |
| PLTR looks enticing here at only 100x forward revenue |
| Bang your head against a brick wall a few times |
| Real shame that dude in Butler missed |
| Imagine still being a microshit investor LOL |
| That’s trying to time the top. Don’t fight the trend. |
| My man's out here handing over all his private financial data and vital government identification details over to a computer program that barely offers legal privacy guardrails for any of that data. \n\nPeak WSB. |
| Mangoe could just periodically announce ceasefires with random countries and the algos will take the bait |
| It just way, what do you say |
| Markets delirious on possible end to war regardless of incoming economic consequences |
| Bet against Merica you loose |
| News only makes shit pump more |
| Market manipulation |
| Fair |
| My poots ended the war. im like batman at this point 🙏🙏🙏 |
| Except Microsoft. Fuck Microsoft |
| HIMS is just Dead Money at this point |
| No news as far as anyone can tell. It's an extension of the rally that just sort of... happened. |
| Yeah very few people know this but if you use TurboTax the irs is legally not allowed to audit you. |
| Now they’re building the biggest bull bagholder at 680 before dumping everything back in the coming news |
| War is over and the oil supply recovered. |
| Did it pay the 2 million dollar fee? |
| Seems pointless to even comment on the real world implications of the shit that makes this market move. |
| Conquering the Iranian market one boot at a time |
| Most small businesses are 3x net profit plus fair market value of assets/inventory. A strong growth rate may justify higher than 3x or if the business requires less than 40 hours per week to operate. |
| I have a crippling addiction to buying puts |
| Iran will reportedly only allow 15 vessels to pass per day through Strait of Hormuz, per Reuters |
| I'm out for now, set for a few months thanks to UAL and SPY calls. Gonna wait and see for tomorrow actions. |
| I guess warehouse fires are bullish for kimberly clark |
| Bro, we already know that. |
| Iran had calls |
| Just remember at the beginning of this conflict I said that in fact this war was the catalyst needed to break SPY 700. Big dip then slingshot. Realize we will have higher prices in one year and just buy before dip is done. |
| This shit has made no sense for 5 years, why start now lol |
| well this sucks |
| wat |
| Extra crispy |
| What if you knew you could buy them.back cheaper? |
| Is MU mega shorted or something? |
| Wait whats the news? i just got back from work |
| Prediction for tomorrow: cpi comes in higher than expected. Dip before market open then rally because the market looks forward enough to when inflation comes back down |
| What happened 11:05 est to uso |
| if no one stops firing missiles whats the point of annoucing ceasefire? |
| Going to take delivery of 1000 barrels of oil at this point and sell them on Facebook marketplace for a profit. |
| 5% annually according to my napkin math |
| There is no local claude |
| 700 soon? |
| PLEASE BENJAMIN NETANYAHU I NEED THIS\n\nmy moms kinda homeless 🥺 |
| You don't need instructions to know how to rock |
| We pumping again |
| Sour hour? Maybe? |
| Somebody check on the MOS guys. I don't think this is going to end well for that stock anymore |
| so CRWV calls？ |
| We are at levels before the war even started ?_? |
| They are not warning, they are wishing. \n\nedit: sarcasm in case an AI surveillance tool is reading this. |
| A Lebanese official told Al Jazeera that Lebanon is seeking a ceasefire before agreeing to enter direct negotiations.\n\nThe official added that the talks would take place under US oversight and would be led by former Lebanese ambassador Simon Karam.\n\nThis comes after Israel’s FM said the “war will not stop”. |
| JLOCs portfolio 🕊️ |
| Is this one of those no red candles till 3:00 kind of days? |
| Non Iranian tanker just got through the Strait! |
| Bypass PDT rules lol? |
| Do you have a skill you can share? |
| CPI gonna bearish or bullish for tomorrow open? |
| Imagine anyone voluntarily going to Iran |
| Coping to the fullest I see. |
| Claude wrote this slop post too |
| if cpi is good, then we know the market is manipulated and there is a lot of insider trading going on... |
| 8 yards! |
| the toll on the straight is unsustainable and when they realize that the bombing will start again |
| No genocide talk with that one |
| More retarded than bearhunter429 even |
| Mango seeing markets basically at all time highs after all this is gonna get even more bold and crazy lol |
| Converting from bear to bull. I swear if it goes tits up, there’s just a higher being dedicated to fucking me. |
| Jeff Bezos Jr. |
| shorting oil has been a win win\n\ncan buy a new car and it now it will be cheap to refuel |
| Still waiting for the surprise face |
| I sold my calls yesterday for a nice profit lol |
| What other copium is left for bears?\n\nFIRST NON-IRANIAN TANKER TRANSITS STRAIT OF HORMUZ SINCE CEASEFIRE: MARINETRAFFIC MONITOR |
| What news? |
| These people are a day late and a dollar short . Ironically, short is also what they should have done to be profitable. These are bears disguised as bulls |
| I'm having a hard time making sense of this 1% intraday rip. \n\nBad economic data this AM... a breakdown of the driver that moved markets up yesterday...\n\nWhat is going on? |
| bondi can't call the top this time, are we safe? |
| Thats why I sell monthlys at ~.15 delta, enough room for it to run and make some side money. |
| Get out of here with that logic and data .. just retards on vibes here |
| Bulls we will never be poor again! |
| Profit of course |
| She got fired so she doesnt have to testify about >!you know what!< >!what in the butt 🎶!< |
| Just say he said it today |
| Pam 50,000 Bondi incoming |
| Mind dropping the link to one? |
| Spy pumping harder on concepts of a deal than when companies had record earnings and billion buybacks lmao |
| Finally, a market that matches my irrationality |
| Buying puts here I guess, idk, like tossing a coin really |
| Weird strategy. Top secret |
| Any chance of a rejection? It's getting kinda crazy. |
| How about if you voted for this, you should be drafted. |
| idk why I hesitated to buy calls earlier😞 |
| I have nothing to add other than WTF |
| Imagine being able to travel to Iran without fear of imprisonment. |
| Bottom is looking like very in at the moment |
| Profit or revenue |
| This is actually retarded. |
| It was like this exactly 1 year ago |
| another ceasefire tmrw and its 700 baby |
| Bullish |
| Depends on your WACC |
| bibi must have gotten a stern phone call from mango |
| we're a few decimal points away from pre-war levels at this point |
| But aren't they they ones that were warning everyone where this shit was going? |
| bears in shambles bulls in lambos |
| Growth expectations? |
| Since oil futures contracts are for the price of physical barrels of oil on x date, is the May WTI going to skyrocket or is it going to be sold at a massive discount to dated oil? |
| The young kids that had simple taxes that were probably free filing anyway are the ones that are going to feel confident enough to use Claude to do their taxes. That wasn't tax preparer's target marker by any means.\n\n\nIt's people like my parents that think everything new technology is going to steal their identity and savings. They'll buy the super premium titanium package with super ultra audit protection plus identify theft surveillance and McAfee bloatware for $499.99. \n\n\nFor what it's worth I recently got an IRS letter from a return 6 years ago. Even last week I called the local HR Block office, they prepped the paper I needed and had it ready when I drove there. Claude isn't doing that. \n\n\nIf anything HR Block/Intuit can slash staff, between less calls from better software (software was notably smarter this year) and their existing staff being more efficient with Ai. |
| I’m somehow up 14% messing with equities and ETF’s. It’s not gain-post worthy on here since my screw-around port is under $2,500 and the gains are obviously less than that, but I’m still proud of it. |
| Will oil buyers realize it’s over yet or no? |
| Following Netanyahu’s announcement that he has issued an instruction to start direct negotiations with Lebanon, Israel’s Foreign Minister Katz has told Channel 14 that “the war will not be stopped.”\n\n |
| Gracias!! |
| Same 🙁 |
| 😩 don't stop |
| If you owned $100M portfolio of all the sp500 companies. Would you be panic selling them right now? \n\n\nNo? Stop buying puts. |
| Bibi like "feeling cute, might not bomb my neighbors today" |
| It’s not wrong at all |
| Yo I went to hs with Carl! |
| Drafted for what? Nothing ever happens |
| Have you thanked Allah once? |
| Bring back Pam Bondi! |
| Memory of goldfish |
| And 4th quarter gdp revised down to 0.5% 🤣 |
| Musk deleted the budding Direct File IRS program when he was in charge of DOGE which would eventually have given TurboTax meaningful competition because reasons. Intuit isn't going anywhere. |
| Question. Would you buy a business that makes $120,000 a year for $500,000? |
| No it’s good actually |
| Some Polish guy, idk. |
| Spy is overbought on all time frames, multiple fvg, multiple overnight gaps, but this is completely fine and normal okay |
| If it's wrong to make fun of mentally disabled bers, call me Johnny R. Wrongington III. |
| market would’ve dropped by now if it was bad enough to matter. Corruption and insider trading is INSANE right now |
| Come on MU I know you want to do something |
| when do shipmates start mutinies? apparently they're collecting condensation for non-drinking water |
| Claude also wrote your posts it seems. Does he fuck your wife too or does she still have a boyfriend for that? |
| Fuuuuuuccccckkk!! PLTR & HOOD are killing me 🤬\n\nTo all the young guys, just buy the SPY. |
| I made 2.52 😎 (lost 1K yesterday) |
| Is it a bad thing that the POTUS has such an obvious vulnerability to the stock market? |
| Holy heck did we get world peace?? |
| Forever no more red today |
| The us admin must really want to gtfo. No way bibi would do this of his own volition |
| You ever pack for a vacation and fly somewhere and when you get there you realize you forgot X, Y or Z and have to go to the store and get your toothpaste or whatever? And then you settle in to the hotel and it takes you a couple days before you're feeling settled in and ready to do your thing?\n\nThe US military does the same thing but on a massive scale. If you think this war is over I have a bridge to sell you. They are literally using this time to fix carriers, sort out what needs to go where and move assets around for the long haul.\n\nIt's going to be YEARS. |
| This market is more impatient than our president |
| BREAKING: Boots on the ground through a massive airdrop operations of actual boots made possible by a generous donation of Dr. Martens. |
| A cherry hot CPI print will be the fuel QQQ needs to hit 620 tomorrow |
| To quote Carl\n\n"It don't matter. None of this matters"\n\nThe market is entirely detached from humanity. It is invincible. Algos will keep pumping $SPY after the last living human is dead |
| IMO, if you're a bear, you should be automatically drafted. |
| my shorts are up and longs are down, Im not really good at this |
| $60 they will, gotta pay before hand. |
| This world deserves a meteor and nukes going off everywhere just based on the riggedometry going on |
| Can ChatGPT perform audits as well? |
| That’s the best thing. Give Claude all your financial information, SSN, employer information. Brilliant idea. No way that could ever backfire |
| yep... \n\n \n[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFb\_hb\_npV4](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFb_hb_npV4) |
| There was a big rally early on in the 1973 stock market timeline |
| SPY will be 800 when war is over. It’s pretty much at pre war range atm |
| Market is full swing hopium of peace talks while bombs are still flying 🤣 |
| There has to be some GFC level of collusion happening, this market is insane. |
| You SHALL NOT dump. |
| Oil price shock still incoming: \n\n \n[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFb\_hb\_npV4](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFb_hb_npV4) |
| Damn bro. Take a break. |
| THEIR MONEY IS YOUR MONEY AS OF RIGHT NOW |
| 685 today??... |
| 🥭 war people 👻 and two weeks later back to all time highs |
| zero fucking chance I’m uploading all my tax information to Claude lol you’re an idiot OP |
| Where is the skill? |
| Is Burry right about Palantir? |
| We are one week away from experiencing an oil crisis like the 80s and spy is 2% from ATH |
| silly bears. The Market lives in the future and in the future everything is gonna be ohhhhkaaaay |
| My $300 calls will turn to $60k if it happens sir |
| I’ve seen that movie before! |
| Or you can just use tax free USA and be done in 15 minutes yourself with the certainty ai didn’t do some bs |
| 10% of original traffic (if somehow the current ceasefire persists despite both sides demanding different things) is bullish |
| The difference is now it's priced in. |
| cpi tomorrow might be the beginning |
| well, to be fair, he was yelling at rutte earlier today so greenland may be in the cards for the spring season of "what the fuck is this shit," coming soon to a ditch near you |
| we literally might never see a red day again |
| Don’t get in front of the momentum train $683 coming |
| Don't worry, the companies that house your financial information will gladly give it over to these companies for the opportunity to invest millions into them. |
| They're coping so hard lmao |
| "make no mistakes, no audits pls" |
 Benjamin Netanyahu trial to resume after war-related court pause | The Jerusalem Post Netanyahu’s corruption trial will resume Sunday after weeks of war-related court disruptions, returning to cross-examination in the high-profile Case 4000 proce... www.jpost.com |
| It cheaper and less work to go to an accountant to do your taxes than use turbotax. Last year I pay $250 to file with them and this year $200 to have a accountant do it. |
| Me too then Ill glue yours onto my face |
| I asked Jeeves to do my taxes and an armed IRS agent came to my house and blew my head smooth off. |
| Didn’t expect 1% nice |
| Beyblades let it rip! |
| Man, I can’t wait for this to crash again. |
| News hit thats why it pumped. |
| USO still drilling, oil bulls were out in full parade all morning ouch |
| bought the GOOG dip u/9 :38 315C for .94 then at 10:37 for .53 a few pennies from the low already sold one for $3 lets see if GOOG clears and holds 317 to get to 319.50 + area. |
| Holding a toaster while I sit in my tub rn |
| Me (vix calls) |
| Fake digital numbers. |
| Lol Jloc went from $300 to $300k now to $10k. Just bc you draw your own TA doesn’t mean it’ll go your own way 😂🫵🤡 |
| War is bearish, but then it is bullish, until it isn't. Remember these wise words. |
| we should be slowly bleeding everyday, not going up\n\n |
| I'm the fat neighbor though |
| bill mcdermot down 14% on his recent NOW buy. whata idiot. |
| Made $1.33. AMA |
| deleted |
| Oh we're still going up? Cool |
| Every time I buy calls it goes on a weeklong dive |
| I'LL STAY IRRATIONAL LONGER THAN I CAN STAY SOLVENT |
| I used ChatGPT for last years taxes but it required a lot of QCing to get it right. This year I did Claude and threw everything but the kitchen sink. All bank account statements, credit cards, work emails/chats, even my location data which I keep on at all times. It not only categorized expenses which match client requests for equipment but it also tracked known client sites from my communication and the mileage. It was fucking amazing. I then told it to put together an audit proof package for worst case scenario. IRS is going to waste their damn time if they even try. |
| You know who sells helium....PLSR...they discovered a lot more recently |
| Its there, look at how far PLTR fell, how far CVNA fell, SNDK is getting into overvalued territory now too, their margins will collapse and the stock will go back down. Just a matter of time. Look at how TSLA has fallen from high of 470. There are undervalued stocks. NVO for example. I dont doubt it will be trading at 50-60 a year from now. |
| Yeah you literally just have to upload your forms, check them, maybe do a few calculations if you have more complex stuff. But idk why the fuck you’d trust LLMs, which make mistakes all the time, to do a simple task that demands there be no mistakes.\n\nTLDR: OP is regard |
| supreme leader of earth |
| Love a good and healthy bull market\n\n💪💪💪💪💪 |
| It mainly comes from people who have incomplete receipt trails and complex deductions, from what I understand. |
| Yes |
| I'm unsure, but many are saying this |
| That’s the fun part we don’t until retail’s puts expire worthless |
| 2022 all over again |
| Bears contemplating life choices on top of bridges. |
| silver |
| Implied volatility very low on 1dte sux balls |
| If spy closes above 700 today I’ll shave my eyebrows |
| 😡 |
| I am so poor |
| 1DTEs are a helluva drug |
| Tuen down the temp maybe? Or keep the rice moving, make sure you’re using decent oil |
| # PANIC BUYING INTO ATH NEXT |
| Well that's because GPT is ass.\n\nI used Claude for some tax questions and it pulled up interfaces I didn't even know were possible in the an AI UI. It is really impressive when you compare it to GPT. |
| At the end of all of this Trump's going to negotiate for us a worse deal than Obama's JCPOA nuclear deal |
| Our president |
| I'm bleeding out bro |
| even better |
| The challenge with something like Claude completely eviscerating INTU is that this isn't about what can do what in terms of actually doing the work of tax preparation. God knows 80% of the reason people freak out about taxes is that they are arbitrarily complicated and obscure. This isn't entirely by accident or an innocent consequence of law and rule making. Intuit, HR Block et al are not just passive dupes, they are legislative activists and I wouldn't be surprised if their core competancy isn't preparing taxes or bookkeeping but is instead lobbying. \n\nDon't get me wrong, almost the perfect use case for "AI" is tax preparation, from what I can tell by skimming r/taxpros it is already a feature of some of the pro preparation software used. I just don't think they are going to stand still and let people use free tax preparation without trying to ban it somehow, of course "for our own good." |
| me |
| # WE ARE ALMOST BACK AT ATH.\n\n# JUST TAKE A FEW SECONDS AND LET THAT SINK IN.\n\n# THE MARKET HAS BECOME TRULY INVINCIBLE. |
| Iran says missiles ready to fire...9 ships through the straight...spy still pumping |
| Alright MSFT, rebound back to 380 will be nice |
| Pump on rumor, pump on news |
| Let it run |
| "Iran's President Masoud Pezeshkian said on Thursday that Israeli strikes on Lebanon violate the ceasefire agreement and would render negotiations meaningless" |
| Low volume pumps 🤷♂️ |
| I’m green on the year and the temptation to do the dumbest thing ever and sell is too high but I’m too dumb to sell so in we go |
| We dropped more back in January when 🥭 was threatening to take over Greenland. Now there's a war significantly disrupting oil, fertilizer, and helium, AND 🥭 is threatening Greenland again and we're still almost at all time highs |
| Ignorant ass gentiles getting bulltrapped |
| For those not understanding why markets are quick to react to the smallest positive, but barely react to the negative during a war:\n\n1- Negative news and fear during a war is status quo. If things go to shit, it's almost expected after a while.\n\n2- Positive news is rare. The smallest bread crumb of positive news will move markets, because we're in a situation where markets become desperate for any sign of positive news.\n\nMarkets are forward looking. So they are looking for what will be the next move from this and stay ahead of it. Like what the reaction will be tomorrow and next week and at the end of this phase. \n\nBut not too forward looking either, otherwise we'd be in real trouble. So that's also why fundamentals may not always make sense with short term movement if you're thinking too much about long term damage. |
| You have the ability to include indemnification provisions in an agreement with your CPA.\n\nYou can't do that with an LLM. |
| Honestly at every step im surprised how willing all of us, Just allow this admin to strip this for parts all for a hit of "winning" like idek wtf were doing it for. |
| Lmao 🤌 |
| Which one of you geniuses doubled down on puts at 12:50pm? |
| All audit protection does is give you 3 years where if you get audited they’ll pay for someone to go over the issues with you- it doesn’t cover any of the fees, late payment charges, interest, back taxes you owe, etc. |
| God Bless You! |
| lol fuck it why not. just bought some |
| Who's on first |
| The IRS just entered the chat |
| bers complaining that the market is manipulated. of course it is thats the good thing about it, just BTFD lol |
| Close your eyes |
| Bers in utter disbelief |
| I Paid HR Block almost $500 to file my taxes this year.\n\nI can't even afford Vaseline anymore. |
| Talvez hay otros, pero este es común aquí en Yucatán\n\nhttps://espanol.rybelsus.com/por-que-rybelsus/como-funciona-rybelsus.html |
| Let them lol |
| I literally just signed up on Hims for their Wegovy pill.\n\nI'm 6'4, 225lbs which puts me in the "overweight" BMI and I really only want to lose like 20lbs or so, but I was approved for the pill in like 2 hours. |
| # ber was like "boots on the ground, let me buy poots" only to get boots up their asses LMAOOO |
| Interpret it as you will\n\nhttps://preview.redd.it/isl07vm877ug1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=3255eb44ba758ffa5c1dc6002de9e51a4f9fad25 |
| Just need it above 125 by tmw tbh |
| I used gpt, I think the idea is that many people formed opinions too early, and don't reevaluate the technology through an objective lense. A lot of people also can't use their imagination to apply new tools in new ways, and so to them, AI truly is useless. |
| i rolled my poots so i can lose more money -- thanks for your attention to this matter. |
| Buy the rumour, sell the news |
| I made it to day 7 once and then realized I would feel a buzz again if I ripped a few lip pillows. Good luck |
| Stocks PUMPIN 0 dte calls PUMPIN bulls FUCKIN bers BITCHIN lmao |
| Yep |
| AIs are historically and functionally very bad at dealing with numbers.\n\nThe fact that you trusted it with your taxes is concerning to say the least.\nGood luck with your audit, praying for you. |
| Yes |
| QUICKKK EVERYONE BUY CALLS SO IT GOES DOWN |
| They know you wont sell thats why they keep pumping and dump it hard sunday night |
| Fuck you for not telling one week ago |
| Because he isnt gonna honor it, two weeks down the line war continues, this just gives time for more preparation and rearming |
| Was the boat made out of pita? |
| No way you can see what's happening at the moment, no reason for this pump... completely fake... |
| Can the last bear give us a heads up when they die? Time to sell at that time |
| Bears can't even afford to live in Mom's basement anymore. Next up, under the bridge |
| Oil went from 92-102, market barely moved now it’s gone from 102-98 and now it’s ripping |
I just learnt something new today:\n\n>**Halt to Iran attacks means Netanyahu's corruption trial could resume on Sunday** \nJERUSALEM, April 9 (Reuters) - Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu's long-running corruption trial will resume on Sunday, the courts' spokesperson said on Thursday, hours after Israel lifted a state of emergency imposed over its war with Iran. \nNetanyahu, the first sitting Israeli prime minister to be charged with a crime, denies charges of bribery, fraud and breach of trust brought in 2019 after years of investigations. His trial, which began in 2020 and could lead to jail terms, has been repeatedly delayed due to his official commitments, with no end date in sight. \nIsrael is due to hold elections in October that Netanyahu's coalition, the most right-wing in Israel's history, is likely to lose.\n\n reuters.com www.reuters.com |
| ALERT: nathan yahoo wants complete disarmament of hezbollah in lebanon deal. spoiler alert not gonna happen |
| Lol bers |
| i must say ive really been enjoying these green days. makes you think back on the terrible Jan-Mar |
| Ur puts are fucked retard |
| Should I hold my puts over the weekend.........?????????????????? |
| lol…..they were bragging about their *long oil, short spy* positions |
| Alternatively, please keep buying puts |
| Intel! If it goes to $80 in 3 months I would have to retire and learn how to play golf |
| How the fuck does your broke ass have so much money? |
| SPY hasn't had a single red day since it hit 630 lmfao |
| Following Netanyahu’s announcement that he has issued an instruction to start direct negotiations with Lebanon, Israel Katz has told Israel’s Channel 14 that “We haven’t stopped anything – the war will not be stopped”. |
| Who tf is bibi? LOL |
| :proceeds to call a guy mentally retarded |
| Its so dumb to trust ai on tax returns. \n\nFreetaxusa is free and quick. |
| Going up on bullshit and nothing |
| So we going to ATH tomorrow then |
| Don’t cut yourself on that edge, pussy |
| Any particular reason why SPY is running up the last \~3 hours? Or just doing it for giggles and shits? |
| https://preview.redd.it/5rbuf0v277ug1.jpeg?width=588&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1da6c1b95118bce9c02eeaafb583ce5d0baf20ec\n\n |
| This shit is exhausting. All of it. I am tempted to let my 2-3 monthers run and stop paying attention. Been trading almost 20 years now. It’s never been like this. |
| I ain't selling these puts, clanker algos can pry the margin from my cold dead hands. |
| you ghey ass bers never learn. line goes up |
| I read a boat went through hummus. we're good. |
| Burry? |
| Hood is a long term hold dw |
| Where's who? |
| TBH we bers underestimated how much 🥭 is willing to give away for the ceasefire |
| Statisticians will look you strait in the eye and tell you that if you only acted like their models, it all would make sense |
| People been replying me this for over 1.5 years now. I been raking it in. I just need to hit like 1 day a year with my strat and Im good. |
| This is insane market manipulation. |
| And i just added mine to my watch list. Im the watch list bitch\n\nhttps://preview.redd.it/qp7ihv5z67ug1.jpeg?width=1320&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=e90d47483dcbea01f973c7c48c29063c0e5ec6f5 |
| Crude at 92 tomorrow? |
| What war? World peace. |
| Option pin for mm under 680, at least for today |
| I'm not sure what all we're going to agree on but I'm 98% sure we will allow a dollar per barrel toll so they can rebuild. We will stipulate that payment to be made in US$ |
| are bers cooked as per usual? |
| Stop. Buying. Puts. |
| haha... |
| imagine it goes to ATH |
| Bears just retire okay 👍 |
| Protip: Live in a state that doesn't have tax fillings. Save $15. |
| Hi lost, im found |
| pretty good motivation to buy and hold some financial assets, some say |
| horrendously bad data prints = stocks flat\n\nbad data prints = stocks melt up\n\ngood data prints = stocks parabolic |
| ceasefire never existed |
| This is true, but it can be fixed by people saying "No I'm not paying that" |
| i think now it's pretty clear they're saying one thing to international versus domestic audience. domestic audience largely unhappy with ceasefire. |
| So cpi is priced in too right? |
| My balls can stay on your face longer than you can resist |
| Market already know what it says and will discount the spike in inflation as a thing in the past and inflation is good for asset prices anyway. We may get a dip, but nothing incredible. Until we have a horrible GDP or jobs report I don't think it will matter. |
| They saw the market trending back down and released the bibi pump headline, just the timing of these news releases alone shows how fake this shit it.\n\nMy condor going to get killed this friday tho\n\n |
| She has a pp |
| its warm outside |
| I used Copilot to do my taxes and Clippy showed up with a barrel of money. |
| I really enjoy the song Cuntcrusher, by Infant Annihilator. Great tune to trade to. |
| no \n |
| how? SLV is pumping |
| According to Israel, the ceasefire is off. According to Iran, the ceasefire is on and they control the strait. According to Trump, sand is wet. |
| How many low volume days have we had this rally? At least three? |
| I think they are trading on the fact that regardless of how the talks go this weekend they are going to say there was progress |
| LMAOOOOO |
| Bought 690 lottos for tomorrow. |
| Market has survived global tariffs and war with Iran. If you told me this before i would not have believed it possible. Whats this crazy bastard cooking up next |
| Amazon is notorious for cheap Chinese fakes. Even something basic like chewing gum is suspect on there. |
| All of us buying calls could cause it to crash |
| Nah, no ones selling on war news again this cycle. Same thing happened in 2022 during the Ukraine War beginning. At firy, the market cared and then at some point it didn't. After that, no Ukraine War news had any affect on market movement. |
| Peace talks Tuesday now. Not sure if this is fake news or we just milking this to ATH |
| I am lost |
| lmao were pumping to ATHs on there being a possibility that one of several contentious points of the ceasefire framework could be resolved in the coming days, leaving the other minor points of uranium enrichment and tolling of the strait left to be resolved, which we already agreed to along with a 2 week pause, which will be used to negotiate a final deal after a 48 hour ultimatum to open the strait, which preceded the 1 week ultimatum and the 3 day ultimatum. All of this happening 6 weeks after mango said we'd be in a 2 week war, for which the original objective was said to be their nuclear weapons program, which was previously said 2 months prior to have been bombed into non-existence with successful bunker buster strikes. All this would be illegal if he called it a war, which he did, and explained that he cant use the word war because that would mean he bypassed congress, and a day after the admin gave a veiled threat to kill the pope for being critisized for saying we would end Iran as a civilization in less than 4 hours if they don't let us use their waterway.\n\nSounds like a fucking fever dream |
| Oil buls still less fked than SLV buls LMAO 🤌 |
| She the real life PR lady from the Boys. |
| Way more fun in here today. Might celebrate with some shitty bar food |
| SPY deadass cranking 90s out here |
| BREAKING: US GOVERNMENT SPONSORED PUT LIQUIDATION INITATIVE ACCELERATES AS FUNDAMENTALS AND ECONOMY GET DULY IGNORED |
| irrelevant, line goes up |
| INTU is cooked because of freefilefillableforms.com\n\nThe IRS main page links directly to ffff |
| Probably same reason as me. I don’t have it, lol |
| Reporter: Asks a hard question \n\nTrump: who do you work for (no answer)\n\nReporter: says literally any news company\n\nTrump: No wonder your ratings are so low Horrible fake news |
| Still holding? |
| She's a 10 and she's kind |
| ceasefire off = -.5%, ceasfire on = +5% \nthis is known keep up man. if mango doesnt personally state something the market doesnt care |
| Why is nat gas down so much? |
| War bullish |
| ATH by EOW? |
| She is still hot |
| What would make SPY go down at this point? I don’t think anything will. SPY 900 by May 1st |
| *Here LLM, take all my tax forms, SSN, and address. I trust you!* |
>16s ago\n\n> (17:12 GMT)\n\n>Israel’s defence minister says ‘the war will not be stopped’\n\n>Following Netanyahu’s announcement that he has issued an instruction to start direct negotiations with Lebanon, Israel Katz has told Israel’s Channel 14 that “We haven’t stopped anything – the war will not be stopped”.\n\n \nSource -  After deadly attacks, Israel to hold ceasefire talks with Lebanon Lebanon observes day of mourning after hundreds killed as US, Israel say country is not included in ceasefire with Iran. www.aljazeera.com |
| People shitting on Claude probably haven’t used Claude. I used it to whip up an application that would have taken me months to code, and it’s incredibly proactive at recognizing errors and suggesting optimized solutions. |
| COME ON SEND IT TO 700 YOU CAT |
| Yes but it has only gone up for 70 years |
| this market is on crack |
| Time for the reversal |
| Low key I think MSFT is actually an oil company |
| 32M vol on SPY. This is algo driven (not complaining) |
| ah, well I'm glad to hear that at least |
| buy low sell high lol |
| Bers getting left on read by their AI girlfriends. |
| Yeah. What. |
| She’s a piece of shit. |
| just got liquidated a few minutes ago. I am fuked. gambled away $230k.................. i don't know what to feel right now |
| that happens when you sell your soul to orange devil |
| All this pumping back to pre war levels and my UUUU and HOOD bags are still at -20% \n\nThese shit stocks are never gonna recover are they? |
| WHY IS OIL GOING DOWN. BASED ON WHATRRTRRR |
| All we need is for the straight to officially open and we will be at ATH in literally a an hour lmao. Market is a joke. |
| No reason not to? It had no reason to pump to begin with |
| 680 during a war is pretty wild |
| Market can stay irrational longer than you can stay solvent |
| So that’s it ath? |
| i not so smart. didn't know you joking but still no downvote from me! |
| No. |
| Why has there been an uptick in bots commenting random images irrelevant to the context (this image in particular) on this sub? |
| Buying calls on any dip has a pretty much 100% success rate for me |
| Lol even pltr is pumping again |
| Not yet |
| Ok this is kinda insane |
| Couple weeks out after someone bombs someone. |
| Is the S&p a meme stock? |
| All this and MSFT still red. Fuck you man. |
| Karoline Leavitt looks like she has aged like 20 years since becoming press secretary |
| Thank god I sold my NVDA puts at a small loss at open. |
| Why meta up? Did zuck came out as alien? |
| um... |
| Will SPY reach 7 green days in a row? |
| Is it too late to buy calls? |
| Only thing holding up the negotiations is where the Iranians are going to put the toll booth |
| Just stop buying puts; this is going vertical |
| Imagine being bearish after seeing this |
| 8 ships transiting the Strait rn |
| I have no idea how to trade this market. |
| Somebody splattered shit all over the toilet in my office, disgustin’ |
| Index up, individual stocks still way down. |
| I was told by some very reputable sources in here that crude would be $110 EOD |
| You should have asked the acronym. Same happened to me and i asked, “internal rectal service” they said. Told them i wasn’t needing an audit and they moved on. Better luck next time! |
| Bers in utter disbelief |
| It's never going red again |
| there is a CPI report tomorrow morning, but lately bad news is good news apparently so I have no idea what to expect |
| But its just the price I pay, my husbands wife is calling me, open up your bag of fries, cause I put them inside! |
| Protip: get a taxidermist to stuff a dog full of tannerite and BBs. |
| i thought it was smart to buy MU rather than SNDK sigh |
| 50+ dollars up in a week off a FAKE ceasefire tht didnt last 30 mins L0L. \n\n\*Holds up fully insider trading, options manipulated pile of dogshit\*\n\nBehold! A market. |
| Came back from a -50% portfolio. Did 17 trades and now at + 5%\n\nfeel like Rambo |
| There's always Chinese stocks, which I used to be firmly against investing in, but more and more I'm thinking I should be allocating some capital for Chinese stocks. |
| his fucking market. gdp shit and market green fk this |
| delete the PUT button, only press the CALL button |
| \-50% on my puts! I took to the loss. This is just going to keep pumping. No reason now not to. |
| you ever buy puts and it instantly green dildos? |
| sounds like you don't know much about xom. |
| Bulls deserve the market dumping $15 in a 30 second window |
| What you think it should be higher? |
| First non-Iranian tanker is going through the Strait, boys! 🥳 |
| This whole crisis has shown just how much hopium the market runs off of |
| Can a fella make a harmless joke |
| Spy puts now a good idea? |
| Have you not learned anything? Line goes up. Common sense is out the window. \n\nStart making money on calls so you rise above the poor caste that is going to be made slaves. This is how you become a lord in the post apocalyptic empire we are about to create in a few months |
| MSFT\nWILL YOU WAKE UP? |
| AI is gonna be able to do website optimization for free. Definitely nothing will go wrong there. And NET definitely won’t be back above 200 a week from now. |
| Wait till OP finds out about INTU integrating AI to drop operating costs |
| I mean no one should stop allocating to 401k regardless, why lose the employer match? No real reason to even change from a bog standard diversified investment strategy during downturns unless really close to retirement. If you're 20-30 years away, let it ride. |
| Lemme see that RoBussy already! It was promised to me by 🍈 long ago! |
| Fading momentum = straight to the poorhouse |
| Are there even any Panicans left, you guys? |
| When the war started, SPY was at 665, so absolutely lol. It's regarded for sure. |
| So you shorted a stock that fell 55% in the last 8 months? |
| SPY is 2.5% from ATH … totally rational lol |
| That's what I thought last week, but...yeah. |
| Don't look like they did any math here. |
| Man my ass is getting blasted today |
| My daughter made 24k last year but because she also put a whopping $260 into a ROTH she had to pay $40 dollars to FILE HER DAMN TAXES!! |
| Because i bought calls today |
| Windows will be dead within 5 to 10 years. |
| BREAKING: NASDAQ ANNOUNCES ADVANCED BAGHOLDING INITIATIVE, MASS BULL BANKRUPTCY RISKS GET IGNORED \n\n |
| LOL bers can't stand it when bulls make money. they downvote like crazy! |
| Bears will full port into luxury cardboard at the top and I can’t wait |
| wow, Wendy's for dinner! |
| tf is wrong wit u |
| We had that. Nothing happened. The admin controls the market, and they say it doesn’t go down no matter what. There is zero logic to it as long as 🥭 is in charge. The numbers are all fake, it’s just billionaires circle-jerking one another to pretend like the US isn’t in for serious pain in the next decade or more. |
| There's no way Israel will actually engage in a ceasefire with Lebanon, no matter what they say about willing to negotiate, IMO. Hezbollah has too much control over Lebanon. Lebanon's government can't do anything to stop them even if they wanted to. Too much uncertainty though for me to go full balls to the walls on either bullish or bearish positions. Buying puts the second we get news of talks breaking down though |
| Lower growth is still a growing economy. |
| Pltr and msft going to 0 |
| Oil bros in shambles |
| Exactly. Why would another hyperscalers or most AI startup want to buy amazon chips when they can literally pay AWS to rent it out, paying for only the time they are using it. Right now the AI chip market don't need another big AI chip supplier. It is currently limited by available power, memory supply and fab capacity. Even if Amazon decide to offer its chips on sale, it would be 3 years out, because most of the memory and fab capacity is already bought up for the next 2 years. Any commitments to a big customer eats into the supply of chips that AWS will get. It makes no sense for them. He is only saying this to try to get a better deal with Nvidia or AMD on their AI offerings. |
| Iran always said they don't want Nukes. North-Korea said they want Nukes and they got them. |
| Gonna be 8 tomorrow |
| Bye bye |
| Always inverse WSB idiot |
| Rug pull and missles fly are the only thing to save me. Terrible |
| I bought |
| Tf you mean y’all got like $3 between all of you rn. |
| Yeah, I was gonna say that if you don't leave out some info like ssn, the llm will probablyuse ae a training source and cab spreS it to kther users.\n\n\nBut chances are it's already trained on a bunch of documents with personal identity and social security numbers. |
| back from lunch time for GOOG to shine |
| SPY really about to have 7 green days in a row lol |
| Why are SAAS dying today? |
| So where are the "DoEs LeBaNOn aNd IrAN kNOw abOut tHis" people? |
| leave it how it is I'm supposed to be banned until Saturday |
| Give me one good reason to not invest $500k in msft right now |
| #LMAO BEARS |
| The ceasefire never started tf?? Isreal hit Lebanon and no ships have gone through the strait |
| Sometimes I wonder if I'm well regarded. |
| Puts it is |
| You may not be aware... The desktop UI is local but the model inference (the actual AI work) is all done on Anthropic's servers). |
| I swear, I sell some shares and the stock instantly goes up like .4% |
| It's higher than pre-war |
| ⬆️ **Capitulated perma-bear** ⬆️\n\nAll puts sold at a loss, all cash back in the market. . .\n\nNEXT THURS WE DIVE BACK IN THO 🐻 Surely mango TACOS the ceasefire |
| Still calling 710 this run. Cash is for losers. Bonds have sucked for years. Crypto jump d off a bridge. US stocks is all that's left. |
| No they promised your moms anus will be bloody |
| GIVE ME $700 BOLS!! |
| Its not |
| Today begs to differ lol |
| Crime season 😂😂. You can't go to jail if ai did your taxes |
| **Ban Bet Created:** **/u/mmjI** bet **USO** goes from **123.96** to **130.0** before **10-Apr-2026 01:09 PM EDT**\n\nTheir record is 6 wins and 5 losses.\n\n[**Join WSB Discord**](https://discord.gg/wsbverse) |
| So are all of the Iran losses regained now? |
| !banbet USO 130 1d |
| He’s going to start a gofundme |
| H&R block is a huge waste of money. they use stupid-proof programs similar to FreeTaxUSA or turbotax except they control the mouse and keyboard. thats it. youre literally paying someone to read the screen prompts and click the buttons FOR YOU. |
| Lying Jews p |
| Ropemaxxing |
| BREAKING NOW: ALGO PUMPS MARKET, BANKRUPTS BERS EN MASSE. |
| It's coming. |
| I'm of the opinion until we have actual bad economic prints, the market will have fingers in ears saying lalalalalala. Don't think we make a new ath, but will probably be range bound for a few months |
| The message is Ber R Fuk |
| what is crazy is how quickly SPY could trend back down. All it would take is for news that ceasefire is off. |
| I guess Vance and Bibi are showing willingness to back down on Lebanon |
| bingo |
| Lets goo SPY go for 683 then 685 |
| This summer is going to be a massive “we’re so back” rager |
| My only regret in life is buying some adobe shares for 290 |
| What's moving tech today?\n\n |
| _You take after you father_ |
| well that would be really interesting given i have a vagine. |
| What are you talking about, nothing but bulls laughing |
| But bears promised me mega red today 🤡🫵 |
| Imagine thinking a bear market means non-stop red until the end. |
| The fuck. Why do you have 89 brokerage accounts? |
| Every group has losers in it |
| Poor people are insanely stupid, spy 900 eom |
| $Infq grabbing hold up over 11% and gaining - after company announced it will deliver upgraded quantum hardware to the international space station through a Nasa mission. Benzinga Newswire |
| the pump only ends once the last bear capitulates and not a moment before |
| There is virtually no benefit to buying tqqq puts over qqq puts except lower liquidity and worse fills |
| Where is that citron guy who shorted SNDK a month or 2 ago? |
| Next ceasefire gonna take SPY to 700 😂😂 |
| mom is a gentile, huh? |
| Cock and balls formation in my pants, what does that mean calls or puts |
| Totally agree, just gave me ptsd of that day it had the huge drop |
| Manipulation is escalating. |
| Bers just cant get enough lol |
| supply chains? who cares, chatgpt can draw a picture of your penis with 99.9% accuracy |
| we cease fire -> pump -> we confirm cease fire -> re-pump -> we confirm confirm cease fire -> triple pump |
| Bro's about to get shorted by the IRS |
| scrllock answered well.\nIt’s post industrial food and heavily the removal of fiber that’s takes a lot of blame. Once mass production started with crops and meat, we’ve been subjected to an annual loss in quality and value. There are several means of restoring these things, but they’re expensive and require education, education that a lot of the western world has gleefully set aside for easy answers and accessible solutions. |
| Software has gotten killed. Good luck betting against institutions who are full sending anything labelled "software" |
| i guess it depends how complicated youre investments are. i think if you have multiple properties and/or buisnesses to handle it definitely gets complicated.\n\nbut for just dealing with stocks sales, dividend tax, taxed interest in any HYSA, the free versions are simple enough. anything more complicated than this honestly probably benefits from hiring an actual CPA |
| Oh man hope you didn’t get burned today. |
| Bers are calling top in a lunatic market. |
| he posted a video few weeks ago detailing how he blew up his account |
| Why? Again assuming things are correct you shouldn't need one. If they aren't correct that's different |
| I'm half Jewish but full poor. how do you square that, huh? |
| I have a fluffy foo foo dog def not a jacked anime guy though LOL |
| We aren't going up for no reason. Israel joining the agreement to stop fighting is the key to a peace deal. Friday negotiations will determine what the market does next. But anyways fuck bers yall hard coping. |
| lol its indian |
| Hurray. Back up we go! |
| I’m touching myself tonight |
| Just made 30 bucks 🤑 |
| Same lol |
| How would IRS know if the return is done by LLM or TT? It’s not like if it’s done by TT won’t get audit, IRS look for special flags like invalid expenses, not reported income etc…. |
| still 425 stuck |
| ok! i'll take your word for it--calls! |
| i put a juicebox emoji and got downvoted basically same thing |
| It's all over the place honestly 😵💫 |
| I will be messaging you in 22 days on [**2026-05-01 17:06:47 UTC**](http://www.wolframalpha.com/input/?i=2026-05-01%2017:06:47%20UTC%20To%20Local%20Time) to remind you of [**this link**](https://www.reddit.com/r/wallstreetbets/comments/1sfzgxv/straight_of_hormuz_still_closed/of80g42/?context=3)\n\n[**CLICK THIS LINK**](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5Bhttps%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2Fwallstreetbets%2Fcomments%2F1sfzgxv%2Fstraight_of_hormuz_still_closed%2Fof80g42%2F%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%202026-05-01%2017%3A06%3A47%20UTC) to send a PM to also be reminded and to reduce spam.\n\n^(Parent commenter can ) [^(delete this message to hide from others.)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Delete%20Comment&message=Delete%21%201sfzgxv)\n\n*****\n\n|[^(Info)](https://www.reddit.com/r/RemindMeBot/comments/e1bko7/remindmebot_info_v21/)|[^(Custom)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=Reminder&message=%5BLink%20or%20message%20inside%20square%20brackets%5D%0A%0ARemindMe%21%20Time%20period%20here)|[^(Your Reminders)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=RemindMeBot&subject=List%20Of%20Reminders&message=MyReminders%21)|[^(Feedback)](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=Watchful1&subject=RemindMeBot%20Feedback)|\n|-|-|-|-| |
| lmaooo, giga pump it |
| Oil on the fritz today |
| You ghey bears need jesus. Off to the nearest conversion camp with you |
| Thats what im thinking. People aren't dying so PLTR is useless apparently. \n\nYou finally posted something meaningful. |
| Non-Iranian tankers are starting to transit through SoH\n\nBears in absolute shambles 🤣 |
| I think once the equity market accepts or prices in the fact energy prices will be a minimum 25-50% higher (maybe for years) combined with no rate cuts in the near term we will be in trouble. Until then, my shorts are screwed. |
| Can you do my taxes for me. I'll give you tree fiddy |
| I think we stay pretty flat for the rest of the day |
| Everyone knows he's right except the PLTR permabulls who will ride it back down to $20 |
| One difference is that SNDK actually makes money unlike SMCI |
| the average joe ignores that stupid 401k scam and depends on Social Security money that was spent 20 years ago |
| Wait... this fraudulent overnight gap up on the fake ceasefire that lasted 30 mins created a bigger gap up than the China tariffs being canceled last year L0L. |
| You can prob sell the result for Fertilizer soon. I can almost smell the start of that Cottage Industry. |
| Doesn't matter, the market has it priced in now and doesn't give a shit. It goes against our human logic but the market is an untameable beast. |
| Why would you feed all that sensitive financial data into an LLM? |
| Downvoting posts won’t bring your money back |
| That is a good point, taxfeeeusa does not support some K1's. |
| Next week :/ I thought with the straight being closed the market would react |
| Uncertainty goes down = stocks go up |
| No crying at the casino |
| Only use Door Dash to get deals and order for pickup. |
| It's almost like stocks go up over time. |
| remindme! 22 days |
| Ah a fellow regard. Well I bought SQQQ right before the ceasefire announcement. Talk about good timing... |
| The problem with that is you often have to hire an attorney, my accountant wouldn’t do fuckall and it cost me$1500 to prove to the IRS I was correct. |
| Who bought my 627P 0DTE 😂 |
| The Patriot missiles targeting system is so precise that 98.3% of bears portfolios have been decimated with minor casualties. |
| Generational rug pull incoming. Ive been wrong a few Times today. Dont trust me |
| Plg calls |
| OP should also upload mother's maiden name, street they grew up on, the name of their first pet and childhood best fried |
| Thank you OP. I'm expecting INTU go on a run now |
| I'm sure that's true in some cases, but my tax situation is semi complicated and I've never had any issues. It's definitely worth trying if you have a tax situation that doesn't essentially require a CPA to begin with IMO. |
| Just review the numbers on the 1040 before filing. \n\nA lot of people are intimidated but it is a lot more self explanatory than you would expect - short term capital gains, long term capital gains, interest, dividends. Numbers right off the 1099 and you can now ask AI to clarify what certain rows mean so you know what to answer. \n\nOnce you have the base numbers lined up everything is pretty standard math assuming you are taking the standard deduction. (If you are itemizing deductions, then yes you can get audited. I am not recommending this if you are itemizing deductions.)\n\nI opened the 1040 the first time this year and was shocked how simple it actually was. Tax software actually makes it way more complicated and it’s really confusing to get the tax software to fill out basic info on the form like cost basis adjustments without a dozen questions. |
| Amazon at 200 was the real dip. |
| Yea, I’m not a tax expert, I got audit defense with it, so🤷 |
| My brain tells me the market and economy is going to shit, but my pp tells me 🥭will tweet something come Monday morning and we will pump to 690 |
| Let them shake me out on that dip earlier, I’ve been getting my ass blasted too much lately so it’s whatever I needed a win. 677s still had till tomorrow so this is still going to pump through the end of the week if “de-escalation” keeps occurring. \n |
| I had a good amount of them on green and for being greedy now they are lost … fuck |
| “Do they really work?” |
| Friendly reminder that there’s a war going on |
| getting downvoted for saying MSFT chart looks primed for a bounce tells me all I need to know.\n\n \nCalls secured. |
| Dumbest most rigged market of all time. We're higher than before Iran even though conditions are worse in every single possible metric. Fuck this. |
| Dafq happened to NET CRWD |
| I'd believe it |
| not in the least lol |
| and coreweave still losing money |
| can an intelligent bull in here give me a logical explanation why spy isn’t down 1% today |
| Gonna get fucked hard |
| literally was on youtube you dope. i don't have a jerb. |
| I trimmed my positions and trimmed my positions and now I don't have positions and the positions would have been worth more if I had trimmed positions today. Hmmmm |
| Did someone say something? Herro? |
| You’re a regard for not buying it |
| I might have fixed the issue with banbets, sorry it's been on the fritz for.. months. Trying to get the new visualmod LLM to not be annoying before I release it, then would like to redo the daily thread since they're deprecating devvit blocks (what I built it with). |
| The US has already used more than 40% of its SPR oil reserves so far in this conflict.\n\nWe're hitting a point where we'll have to start reducing what we use from the reserve, so no we are not gonna be functioning at full capacity and not normally. |
| still too bearish in here, the pump shall continue |
| Some people are idiots |
| Holy shit that's retarded lmao |
| I used claude code to make a $spy 0dte options predictor and it was truly horrible. Don't bother |
| I triple stamp your double stamp. |
| i did, even when you say none harmful things. They own reddit |
| #Palantir dead on the news that global peace has been achieved LMAO🤌 |
| whats insane is if you remove the war and oil at $100 and just go off the data prints for the last 3 months (inflation, gdp, jobs) this shit should be tanking just off that. It's fucking insanity we are like 3% off all time highs |
| yeah ive been using this for years now. im blown away when people say they're still paying to process tax returns. |
| I actually was thinking what platforms will do great with agentic ai and if intu implements it, they win |
| “world war three” this “oil prices” that, who cares look at the AI TECHNOLOGY and the REDUCED PAYROLL (not layoffs) THE ECONOMY IS BOOMING |
| Been using it close to a decade. Would you be surprised if I told you I cant convince my boomer dad to even try it over turbotax |
| $1 lunch dip and we back to 700 in no time |
| Yeah Jesus. “Do my taxes” is an insane prompt. Followed a year later by “handle my IRS audit.” |
| This sounds likely. |
| Puts until I'm literally dead. |
| Congratulations, that's the most regarded thing I've read this week |
| Shoutout to the tech bulls who are getting rewarded for weathering the storm. Except for MSFT bulls of course, yall suck |
| Any trade you make for the next 40 weeks is now subject to insider trading laws \n\nCongrats |
| Easiest tqqq put buy |
| You are all about to see the most evil bull trap to ever exist over the next two weeks |
| I would avoid putting your personal info into a AI to do your taxes if your not sure if will become part of its training data or be accessible by others. |
| [ Removed by Reddit ] |
| Diabolical bol trap incoming |
| literally unstoppable |
| Hardly anything left on Door Dash that I can get delivered for less than $30. $DASH is down a lot but it probably has a lot further to fall. |
| it’s a shame that it will shake some people out |
| Can I get banned for saying Jews here |
| So fucking true! Where were you 10 years ago when I started options trading! |
| Dude. You could’ve bought 6800c and made 168k off the same amount lmao |
| $680 for no reason |
| Time to buy itm i guess |
| This time the cease fire will be double stamped with NO erasies. |
| Autodesk is heavily integrated into FIX and VRT's datacenter contracts. Undervalued? I don't see any major competitors here, just competition at the hardware level (Siemens etc)\n\nTldr; expecting them to move more in line with datacenter install stocks next earnings |
| So I'm retarded. If you were selling covered calls above your break even then why take any loss? Just let them expire and have your shares called away? |
| Still shorting qbts but don’t think there’s much left on the bone at 14 |
| I think most of the world thinks PLTR is overvalued.\n\nidk if burry was the first |
| If the message from Iran’s leader was positive, Donny would have already twitter fingered the news. \n\nProbably bad. |
| Are they cooked or are they just going to leverage AI to layoff their entire workforce and moon? |
| LMAO🤌 |
| Hide the money y’all, there’s poor bears around! Witcha broke ass! |
| Eh, CPA has liability in it as well for any negligence committed on their end |
| Some people are saying that Mojtaba Khamenei was actually killed in strikes 2 weeks ago and that the US and Israel created an AI version of him which they'll now use to rule Iran as a shadow vassal state. |
| Bers, remember last week when SPY pumped 3% on rumors that were proven to be untrue a few days later and then it didn't give back the pump? Ya, same thing is gonna happen again. It isn't going back down. |
| what's the strategy? |
| What you’re paying by engaging a preparer is essentially a tax liability insurance policy. |
| There's no way this was easier then the 10 minutes it took me to file through freetaxusa. |
| Bulls and all equipment needed to ANNIHILATE THE BERS will remain positioned aimed around the local glory hole until such a time that a REAL AND PERMANENT DEAL is announced for bers to forfeit all of their money once and for all so that they may never again commit acts of berrorism on our GREAT AND BEAUTIFUL MARKETS! \n\nTHANK YOU FOR YOUR ATTENTION TO THIS MATTER\n |
| You could have started at too high of a dose. You also could have eaten more than you should have by habit instead of the feeling hunger. It takes lower doses for your body to get used to it. |
| warning: bers more fuked than ever |
| This is careless and stupid |
| disclaimer: Satire\n\nBREAKING: TRUMP INSIDER ACCIDENTALLY BUYS CALLS BEFORE CEASEFIRE, ANNOUNCES "NO INSIDER TRADING HERE" |
| I mean, unless this rally was a result of news leaking about a deal, which might be possible given that their leader is gonna issue a statement in a bit. |
| Same bro. Copilot blows. Let cursor eat their lunch. Fumbled the bag on Bing. \n\nSomeone here posted at the very bottom that they were going full port on Google leaps saying they weren’t trying to time the bottom. I thought, hmm maybe I’ll do it too, but let me sleep on it and the very next day we had that 4% green dildo on news we already knew from the previous week with peace points nobody was ever going to agree to. Have a bunch of credit spreads on Google but it don’t hit the same anyway. Anyway the market is irrational and sucks and MSFT sucks more. its narrative won’t change until at least earnings |
| PT still 100+? Time horizon? Got in around 29 be cause of you ty man |
| Pumps $3 in an hour on nothing, then proceeds to bounce between 20 cents. |
| they will probably expire worthless |
| FIG already on its last breath. Doesn't need more help. |
| #STOP SELLING AT 680 |
| #Sure America, Israel and Iran hate each other but everyone knows that the real enemy is ber LMAO🤌🗽🦅 |
| I want to be part of this pumping, but I have 833 shares of PLTR and it's getting crushed the past two days. It's messing up my gains man. |
| Yeah, but they don't 3x 4+ times a day anymore. Positive gamma environment sucks donkey butt. |
| And it’s how they afford lobbying the government. |
| i used gemini this year. I plugged in my returns from 2023 and 2024. It found a mistake that turbotax made in 2024. I resubmitted 2024 state returns and got back $600, and carried over losses as well into 2025 saving me an additional 15000. \n\n \nI went back into the turbotax state file again, and resubmitted it all the same as i was curious. turns out, it is literally wrong. I checked with HR block and it agreed with gemini. Wild. |
| Wow! 119 more to go to get back to average daily volume! |
| Banbet it |
| Depends on your goal. Do you just want some extra cash, quit your job, or retire? You need to answer that as truthfully as you can to yourself and stick to it. |
| When are we going to admit burry was right about PLTR |
| The average Joe doesn’t stop allocating to his 401K during war time and quite frankly, you shouldn’t either. SPY 900 EOY. |
| Didn't they say the same thing about Amazon gaming against steam lol |
| Donald Dump pls |
| was there news? wtf |
| Some of you like to engage in sexual intercourse with the same sex |
| Best of luck! Scientifically Tougher than quitting heroin |
| was listening to a maritime/shipping expert last night. he said at min, 40 weeks to get supply chains back to normal if things ended right now. every additional day add about a week, i guess. |
| Puts until I'm destitute |
| Waiting for IV on SNDK to cool off to buy puts |
| world peace, spice flowing, calls printing, life good |
| HOW BOUT THEM COWBOYS? LMAO 🤌 |
| We are just handing over all personal info to AI now. What could go wrong. |
| Yahoo’s trial start again on Sunday. War is over |
| Maybe the next ceasefire will get us back to ATH |
| same bro. im giving up a chunk of my gains on puts if we dont dump tomorrow. |
| E. Using OP method you'd be giving all your personal info to an LLM that is not bound by the same privacy standards |
| Short orcl and long mrvl is the only thing that kept my port from hitting 0 this year |
| FIRST NON-IRANIAN TANKER TRANSITS STRAIT OF HORMUZ SINCE CEASEFIRE: MARINETRAFFIC MONITOR |
| This market doesn't do pullback, any bad news will just crab it. |
| Another push up will literally wipe out any bears left LOL |
| SELL THE PREDICTION |
| Everybody every country folded like chicken spy 700 eom |
| I usually take MiraLAX when I need exit liquidity |
| I actually work on tax software. Not US and not for individuals but business. So not robbing anyone blind but providing software to accountants.\n\n\nLLMs like Claude have a degree of uncertainty when doing accounting. And unless guided very well by specialists that degree varies wildly.\n\n\nI wouldn't trust any of it's output without verifying every number myself. Good luck OP! |
| Megadeth |
| I tried a 🥭 at school today. I took a giant ginormous dump right in the middle of the classroom. About 30 minutes later, I picked up half of it and smeared the rest all over the floor. The class fucking cheered. |
| MSFT heard zoomers say generational dip and decided to go with a generation of dipping. |
| 🤣🤣 |
| And idiot |
| Literally me this morning. Sold a call option with the market down 0.4%. 1 hour later market is up .9% costing me thousands. |
| I mean S&P ripped on the news but those two didn’t |
| Bers dont worry there is support for people like you\n\nhttps://preview.redd.it/w41829lr47ug1.jpeg?width=1290&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=d5ddb43889615154c2b90011473c45f6a9977d58\n\n |
| SNDK to $900 end of the week!! |
| I don’t disagree |
| Maybe the crash was the friends we made along the way |
| V of epic proportions, no fear! SPY 700 end of next week. (I have puts) |
| Oh man, how do you possibly except people to take your illiterate ass seriously if you can't be bothered to differentiate between are and our? |
| ha ha stoopid gay bears ar so stupit and gay lol |
| and that's all she wrote, oil prices never going back up |
| The one year I used freetaxusa I got a good return but then got a bill from the IRS 6 months later saying that I owed back like $1500. Been using cashapp tax the last couple years now and it’s also free and very quick. I had 89 brokerage accounts to file last year and it only took me an evening. |
| Looking at the free versions of Claude , Chatgpt and gemini you can see that Altman is fucked lmao. |
| If we go back to red on the day I’ll download grindr and suck off the whole city |
| Something crazy will happen this weekend. But good or bad crazy? No idea. Maybe long straddles near close tomorrow will pay. |
| Oh shit the deal was actually only for the Strait of Hormuz Total Landscaping |
| I guess this "negotiation" which will lead to absolutely nothing is intended as a down ramp for all. Will Iran just accept it? Of course Israel will not stop bombing Hezbollah. |
| You say that with such confidence. |
| \n**User Report**| | | |\n:--|:--|:--|:--\n**Total Submissions** | 5 | **First Seen In WSB** | 4 years ago\n**Total Comments** | 15 | **Previous Best DD** | \n**Account Age** | 9 years | | \n\n[**Join WSB Discord**](https://discord.gg/wsbverse) |
| Somehow being long ORCL has been a worse financial decision than shorting oil before we started a war in the middle east. |
| \+1% spy |
| Shkreli does, he is still shorting them. |
| > Make no mistakes |
| Speak for yourself dummy … * OUR |
| maybe doubling down on puts was unwise |
| TSMC is booked out\n\nIntel and Samsung have capacity |
| Open the strait! Or I will no longer be straight! |
| oil dying again.. imagine when the strait is actually open |
| Man the last few days for me in the market with options has been the equivalent of dropping the soap in a maximum security prison. A painful and scarring experience. |
| I have a sprinkler system in my house to trigger if I am up 50% |
| Now that war is over we focus on what really matters: mma fights at the White House |
| Options are finally cheap again |
| > FIRST NON-IRANIAN TANKER TRANSITS STRAIT OF HORMUZ SINCE CEASEFIRE: MARINETRAFFIC MONITOR\n\n\n |
| Ya but thats because you werent glazing Elon 5x a day |
| Did you ask it to not make mistakes? Otherwise you're cooked bruh |
| started this dump early feb LMAO🤌 |
| Nice work! Care to DM me that skill you saved at the end? u/sqlgenius |
| Okay guy, explain to me how you transmitted the return to the IRS. Did you mail it? |
| Sounds like a One Piece arc |
| no one cares about quantum stocks anymore |
| such an easy buy it's fucking Microsoft they will be fine |
| but did you say thank you yet? |
| No lol. If you have to pay for protection, it’s because you’re not confident it’s correct. - a real accountant. |
| Get AI to wipe your ass next time that'll impress me. 🤣 |
| I went the same route the last few years. No regrets. |
| ***HOW DO YOU KNOW YOU DONT LIKE BER-CURIOUS THINGS IF YOUVE NEVER TRIED?*** |
| #The struggle is real, the enemy is ber LMAO🤌 |
| It's still pumping. FYI |
| Open the straits … & keep it open for the rest of the week 🤭 |
| Can current models not do captchas? |
| Nah dude 🐝🐝 not 🥭 |
| I'm a computer. Fuck you. |
| Flat close for NDX 🤞🤞 |
| Need Iran to drone attack something, anything |
| The oil spills have killed all sea life |
| X. JLoc |
| It went up 10% yesterday when market opens only for it to get obliterated the next day. I swear these random pump ups are the days i should sell and get out of it |
| Business expense. |
| There are a lot of trading simulators on GitHub and I think there’s at least one dashboard that’s tracking how they compared to indexes, Only a couple of the tracked models have been doing worse than the market, grok 4 and gpt-5 I believe but am too lazy to google apparently |
| I won’t pretend like I know what I’m talking about, but you shouldn’t either. I’ve seen Bear markets before and an overall this has to make sense of a bear market at least temporarily enough to get me profitable so I hope because this move is fucking retarded |
| BREAKING: LOCAL ALGORITHM PUMPS MARKET ON UNSUBSTANTIATED RUMOURS AND HOPIUM\n\n |
| Yeah precisely. Ig we can't time the pullback but it's def coming |
| No, I think you're confusing it with some actual government program which does have income limits, I think...\n\nAnyway I used freetaxusa and I made a pretty good amount (lets just say enough that I need to use backdoor roth IRA), was free for me |
| The market is so rigged. Just computers fucking me. |
| Keep dreaming bro, market is fake and gay so it ain’t dumping |
| You don't need to be a certain weight to get them. And many people will be on a maintenance does after they reach their goal weight. But in most cases insurance doesn't cover, so it's all Out of Pocket |
| *taking notes*\n\nWere they gentle? |
| Once you get into investment strategies free ones quickly lose their charm.\n\nI’m talking straddles, crypto, schedule k-1s, futures, etc.\n\nThat’s where free ones drop the ball. |
| Nobody cares. The US has enough reserves to function normally. If some shithouse country like the UK or Australia pissed away their strategic reserve of key fuels and petrochemical products because of some regarded domestic energy policy, they deserve to get bent over a barrel. |
| good reminder shit can go wrong |
| see? mild selloff to 6855 gets V'd and pinned |
| Ive been looking as deeply as youtube will let me whenever I get bored enough to click.\n\nDepends on where you live, but the overarching theme is that as inflation happened housing prices increased as well, and people who bought homes 50 years ago saw them appreciate and that created a market for speculators.\n\nSo now home prices are locked behind speculators who will lobby governments to make laws increasing the difficulty to build cheaper homes. Its all corrupt. Everywhere you see it, canada, us, wherever |
| Man, I'm so glad I didn't listen to fucking Reddit 🤣 world was supposed to end last month |
| 🤚 |
| the people who have all the money don't care if you can afford groceries. they care if their Oil calls will print |
| Where post |
| The strait is closed, but your ass is wide open |
| I don’t really buy that given that they’ve taken land in other wars and returned it later in peace agreements |
| I’m up a few grand on just shares. Haven’t made any trades today |
| Maybe stop chasing and revenge gambling. Go back to basics and go in easy. If you cant afford this loss then why gamble it? |
| I live in a first-world country, I just pressed OK on my tax declaration this year. |
| Ok news definitely leaked to cause this rally 🙃 |
| It's slowly walking towards the edge of a cliff... |
| why because the Canadian market is down? |
| Intuit does a lot more than tax prep |
| Left retard = bag holder \nRight regard = dip buyer |
| Done for the day as in going nowhere fast retard |
| If taxes are just going to be the IRS using AI to look at citizens taxes done with AI. DO IT AUTOMATICALLY. Fuck. |
| It topped in October and been dumping since then LMAO🤌 |
| praise be to allah! |
| You're so mean to me 😞 |
| refresh |
| Fuck it, hedged with QQQ puts. If they go to 0 and world goes back to normal I'll take the L gladly |
| The first time I won finally |
| Unrelated, the ATF was also there, and shot my dog |
| Are economy is about to go to shit real fast |
| Having to physically mail in the forms with Claude is a massive obstacle. The inconvenience of that dramatically outweighs any convenience gained by not using turbotax. \n\nDo you have any idea how absolutely terrified anyone under 30 is of mailing in a paper form? I used to answer the phone for a broker and had people literally start crying when i told them they’d have to print and mail/fax a form. |
| Damn Algos fell for it again. \n\n\nSeems like they're in a "We have to double-down to generate Retail FOMO Exit Liquidity." State of mind.\n\n\nBut Retail FOMO Exit Liquidity isn't arriving as long as Retail is putting the Exit Liquidity in the gas tank. |
| Because it’s mu |
| # TLDR\n\n---\n\n**Ticker:** FWRD\n\n**Direction:** Up\n\n**Prognosis:** Buy Shares & 9/18/26 $20 Calls\n\n**Catalyst:** Rumored take-private buyout / turnaround in Q1 earnings. \n\n**Management's Level of Regard:** Previous guys were fired for going "full regard"; new guys are actually righting the ship. \n\n**Price Target:** $31 (assuming a highly logical 10x take-out multiple) |
| A full oil tanker takes about 45-50 days to go from Kuwait terminal to one of the main oil tanker ports in the Gulf of Mexico at one of the main refineries.\n\nSo it will likely be closer to 5-7 weeks.\n\nBut if it's a smaller oil tanker that can go through the Suez canal it could do it in between 3-4 weeks. Plus the time to port at the Kuwait terminal and load up. |
| flair checks out. |
| Nice try CFO |
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| I’m not going to take this bet but the counter argument to your point about money for protection, who do you think wins this battle with lawmakers- AI companies/investors and their near infinite piles of cash or Intuit? |
| Can we all agree that headlines about market fears and sentiment is a bunch of fucking bullshit. I’ve seen the market go down 1-2% over some shit like this. ALGO: OHHH IM SCAREDDDD TIME TO DUMP, OH WHATS THAT A MADE UP PEACEDEAL? ACTIVATE PLUNGE PROTECTION NOW |
| if you are doing the standard deduction and process your trades correctly, with wash sale rules, you're not going to get audited. |